Re: "Happiness equals reality minus expectations."

["Don E. Z'Boray" <zboray@airmail.net>]

singerson wrote:
[snipped]
> Happiness equals reality minus expectations.
> 
> Anyone know the source?
Here's a starting point:  I found the same quotation being used by the
keynote speaker at an annual CEO breakfast, as reported in the daily
ezine of The Construction Specifier web site, June 26, 1999
(ref: http://www.csinet.org/confer/99daily/sat/saturday.htm).
The writer (Dianne Baldwin) quoted Raymond G. Torto, Ph.D., CRE,
founding principal of Torto Wheaton Research in Boston as saying
"Happiness equals reality minus expectations," when addressing the
group on the topic of "Can we trust happiness?" as it relates to the
construction industry.
I first came to know of that quotation more than 25 years ago when it
was used by a philosophy professor of mine: "The equation for happiness
equals what you have over what you want.  The fewer wants you have, the
happier you will be."  Unfortunately, I have long ago tossed my notebook
and I cannot recall to whom he attributed it.
I am skeptical about the idea that its author was Dr. Torto.  If he was
quoting some other source, the reporter did not make mention of it.
However, the short article in the URL cited above attributes the
quotation to Dr. Torto.  Perhaps the reporter is not familiar with
Zen.  Btw, Diane Baldwin is the Editor of "The Construction Specifier"
and her work phone number is - toll free - (800) 689-2900 ... 
singerson, why not just pick up the phone and give her a jingle to
ask her about the use of the quotation in her article?
http://www.cybernauts.org/dwoo/quotes_file.html attributes the quotation
right back to the source that singerson reported hearing it from ...
Click and Clack, The Tappet Brothers of NPR's Car Talk (a.k.a., Tom and
Ray Magliozzi).  Could this very insightful piece of wisdom actually
come to use from the world's foremost advisors to shade tree mechanics?
Other URLs with attribution to the Magliozzi brothers --
http://x27.deja.com/getdoc.xp?AN=314920860&CONTEXT=940228782.253296718&hitnum=0 
(Jan. 11, 1998) -- warning! -- this was a Usenet post to
news:alt.child.support and it is part of a thread in which participants
were uncouth in their public use of the English language!  Expletives
were not deleted.
I have written to Click and Clack about this quotation ... Now we'll
see if they really read their e-mail, at the least.  If relevant info
is forthcoming from them, I'll be sure to pass it along in qr-l.
And, there is the other side of the coin to consider ... that this
quotation is actually something paraphrased from another that has
quite the opposite meaning.  See, from March 23, 1998:
http://www.nationalreview.com/23mar98/shalit032398.html where Wendy
Shalit (National Review) deals with Dennis Prager's book, "Happiness Is
a Serious Problem: A Human Nature Repair Manual" (HarperCollins,
179 pp., $23) ... quoting her article, I share with you:
"It also helps considerably if you lower your expectations to meet
reality.  One of Prager's examples is a man waiting for 'a Playboy
Playmate who studies Torah.'  This is unrealistic.  He reminds us that,
'in general, expectations lead to unhappiness.'  So does hoping for
unconditional love:  'Seeking unconditional love is a vestige of
childhood.'  Prager even equips us with a formula, 'U = I - R,' which
he calls 'The Unhappiness Formula: the amount of Unhappiness equals
Images minus Reality.'"  ... hmmm ... yes, the waters are getting
muddied with this one.... Miss Shalit, btw, is a contributing editor of
"City Journal" and you can track her down by checking out 
http://www.city-journal.org/.  Prager can be contacted through 
http://www.dennisprager.com/.
Prager's viewpoint is similar to Eric Hoffer, who wrote in 1954,
"The search for happiness is one of the chief sources of unhappiness."
Other happiness equations:
--------------------------
Alexandre Dumas has his Count of Monte Christo whines, "My present
happiness equals my past misery" in Chapter 71.
The idea has also been mathematically postulated in yet another way:
"Expectation over Reality equals Happiness," though I don't know who
to attribute that one ... maybe Anthony Robbins ;-).
Let's keep hunting on this one.
atbty,
-- don  ;-)
Don E. Z'Boray, webmaster@newbie.net
Site #393:  Steven Wright JumpStation (& Quotes)
            http://newbie.net/JumpStations/StevenWright/